20+ Signs that you have been in China for a while

Every time that I sit down to write a blog, I am never sure where to start. I have been in China for over 9 months now, (crazy!) and it seems to me like I constantly go back and forth between feeling completely comfortable, at home, and maybe even a little bit settled, and then something as simple as walking down a crowded and bustling street can bring on feelings of utter awe at the fact that this is my life, these are my surroundings, and there is Chinese coming out of my mouth. Being 21 years old, it is pretty crazy that I have been given this opportunity to spend so much time in China. Of course, you can't spend time in a place like China for this long without it having definite side effects. I am not saying that these side effects are in any way negative. They are just things that I have been noticing about myself lately. And they are kind of funny (at least to me).

You know you have been in China too long when...

1.Given the choice between Western Toilets and Chinese Toilets, you opt for the Chinese ones because they are more sanitary.
2. You have mastered the comfortable there-is-no-chair-so-I-will-squat-and-be-as-comfortable-as-I-am-in-a-chair position.
3.You never put anything on the ground because they ground is dirty. Bags (no matter how large) must always be kept in your lap or on the seat next to you because the ground is covered with unspeakable things.(see numbers 4 and 5)
4.You are not at all phased when you see small children peeing or pooping on the sidewalk and even have began to see the logic behind it. (so many babies in china....that would be a lot of dirty diapers.)
5.You don't even bat an eyelash when an old man, old lady, young man, young lady, or overly adapted foreign friend spits on the ground dangerously close to your leg, arm or face.
6.You think tank tops are inappropriate.
7.You no longer crave Western food. Instead, you feel unsatisfied if your meal does not include rice or noodles. (Don't even talk to me about fork and knife wielding abilities.)
8.You begin to think that the latest Chinese fashions of wearing short shorts with tights and high heels is kind of cute and you are considering investing in some.
9. You take your female friends hand when you cross the street and do not assume that the guys walking in front of you with their arms around each other are gay.
10. You are beginning to become convinced that you are, in fact, the most beautiful person in the world, because of how many times you have been told this by random Chinese people.
11. You find it completely appropriate to throw a few elbows while waiting in line for the bus, bathroom, etc. (All the old people do it!)
12. When you speak English, you generally speak slowly, all in the present tense and use simple words. This is partially so that non-English speaking friends can understand and partially due to the fact that you forget how to use big words and how to correctly use complicated things like past participles.
13. You drop words like "qingkuang" and "mafan" into your everyday speech and assume that everyone around you understands what you mean. (they usually do)
14.You are in love with green tea.
15. Chinese sounds normal to you. When you try to explain English words to people you get very angry because English makes no sense.
16. You are pretty well informed on the situations in Tibet, Taiwan, and Xinjiiang. (from the Chinese perspective, of course.)
17.You are considering getting a choppy, asymmetrical Chinese hair cut. Possibly one that involves a rat tail, looks like a mullet, or seems to be lacking in all logic. (Just kidding, I would never actually do that.)
18. You like China textured things. Let me described China texture: not solid, but not liquid either. Jiggly, but more firm than jello. Generally either an unattractive brown-black color or bright and pastel pink, purple, or green. Not really sweet, and with no real distinct flavor. Utterly delicious.
19. You think that spending more than $3-4 on a meal is absurdly expensive.
20. You have forgotten about the existence of tax and tip.

Additional things that I have thought of over the past 24 hours:

21. You are shameless about asking people how much things cost, how much they make, how much their house cost, how much their car cost, and just about anything else involving money. When you get something new, you automatically tell everyone how much it cost.
22. You drink yoghurt with a straw.
23. You are no longer offended or made even the least bit upset when people tell you that you are fat. Because, in comparison to them you are fat. You are huge.
24. You have adopted Chinese noises. For example instead of saying 'wo' or 'yikes' when something bad happens, your natural response is to say 'ai-ya' or 'oi-yo.' And you think that sentences sound completely impolite and unfamiliar if you don't end them with 'ah' 'ma' 'ba' or 'ga'.
25. You only curse the government a few times when they block gmail, youtube, blogger and many other sites that are crucial for your survival during the weeks surrounding the anniversary of Tiananmen (and then you discover the magic of proxy servers).